MINECRAFT: TALES FROM THE ASS
by AnimeFreakIncs
Summary: In this Humorous Parody of MineCraft, I will Take ANY STORY you have from MineCraft that ended up with You having some sort of Fail at the end! From Mining to Raiding I GOT IT ALL! Told in ANY PERSPECTIVE YOU WANT! *Rated T for Language, Might turn to M, but this is what i call rated T so DEAL WITH IT *I Will need ONE of your usernames for your story, doesnt need to be MC UserName.


EPISODE ONE: "A Fine Mess"

Character: ASDFGuy

ASDFGuy is a MineCrafter, ASDFGuy cant seem to keep people as friends in MineCraft, so, he had to raid stuff lots of times from people that raided him, he was somewhat new to MineCraft, and thought you can only sleep in the beds YOU PLACED. One Day, something like this happened...

"FINALLY! I GOT DIAMONDS!" ASDFGuy yelled happily in the world of MineCraft. "After MONTHS OF BUILDING a God Damn Mine! I FOUND SOME!" ASDFGuy was on a server, popular with his friends from school, the only MineCrafters he could ever trust, just recently, one of his friends, Just go MineCraft, and invited him to a server! They forgot to give each other theyre names, and he couldnt go asking EVERYONE, So, he had to wait until the weekend was over. "I cant wait to tell my friends!" ASDFGuy logged off, or in MineCraft terms to Hardcore players, 'Went to Sleep'. A Few hours pass, and someone, lurking in a tree, see's that he left...

"Now i can see how many diamonds this person has," The person flies over to his house, and starts opening the chests..."How the FUCK did he get this many!?" He asks, Apparently, this person was the admin, and was on a God Armour Check, his rule is, You can have god armour, as long as it is SOMEWHERE safe, such as, a Ender Chest, in the Nether, In a pool of Lava, under the rocks near the bottom of the world. He checks for it, and deletes it, to keep players from over powering others. and only lets Staff members and VIPS or whatevers get them. ASDFGuy, or ASDF for short, logs on again.

"HEY! WHAT THE HELL ARE YOU DOING IN MY CHESTS!" He shouts, "Umm" The Admin says, he normally joins hidden, and gave himself a nickname, so no one knows its him,

"HEY WHO WANTS TO HAVE MINECRAFT SEX!"

Some random player shouts, everyone on the server goes silent for a while. ASDF, hates these kinds of players, so, ASDF says, "SHUT UP! THATS WEIRD DUDE!" And starts a argument, giving the admin time to escape, "Better leave before this gets messy," he says, The admins skin, is the usual custom MineCraft skin, a Creeper in a suit, for whatever reason its popular. ASDF sees him fly away,

"GET BACK HERE ASSHOLE" ASDF Shouts, chasing the flying player, he chases him to a desert, to a huge, fort, made out of stone bricks. The flying man disappears into the house. The house is massive, and ASDF Gets lost in the hallways. "Dammit, lost him, didnt see his name. but i know his skin!" He says, ASDF, after hours of running around the Fort, finds a person in that skin! "BASTAAAAAAAAAAAARD!" He shouts, and kills him. "Now to blow up this place and get out!" ASDF places whatever TNT he had and could find in chests, or craft, its nearly enough TNT to explode 'The End' over 5 times. "Here goes," He lights the tnt with a flint and steel, and starts running, around 10 seconds later, there is silence, lag spike of doom, then, explosions everywhere, fire balls of death are everywhere. ASDF runs away from the fiery ball of doom as fast as he can, and barely escapes. Just then, "WHO BLOW UP MY HOUSE!" Someone shouts, ASDF turns to go home, and sees a flying Creeper suit guy. "YOU! ASDFGuy! YOU DID IT! WHY!?" He shouts.

"Because you raided me,"

"No i didnt, I AM THE ADMIN! I WAS MAKING SURE, YOU DIDNT HAVE GOD ARMOUR!"

"GUYS FREE MINECRAFT SEX HERE!"

"SHUT UP FUCKMONKEY77!" Another random player screams. "Guys im only 5 years old, stop fucking swearing" "Yeah right" Theadmin, finally about to explode, Mutes everyone besides ASDFGuy. "Ok, now, Why did you blow it up." the admin says, "You raided, and what is God Armour? is it my Protection IV? That doesnt seem 'God' to me." "No its armour with Protection, Fire Protection, Blast Protection, Projectile Protection's at level X or something." "So, your a hacker, calling himself the admin, taking hack armour? such low class pla-" ASDFGuy is banned in the middle of typing, In reality, he says, "Damn, what the hell was that..."

THE NEXT DAY *DUN DUN*

"Hey you never gave me your name!" ASDF's friend says in the middle of class. "Yeah, some hacking asshole raided me, and i griefed his house, then the hacker banned me." "Huh? Funny, same thing happened yes...ter...THAT WAS YOU!?" His friend shouts, "DUDE! THAT WAS MY HOUSE I HAD ALL MY ITEMS I WAS GOING TO GIVE YOU IN THERE!" The class looks at them awkwardly..."We'll talk about this later?" ASDF Says, "Just shut up Noel..."

Noel, or ASDFGuy, and his friend, ZappyBuddy369 are both still friends.

SPECIAL THANKS, TO ASDFGuy for Sharing this Story!


End file.
